oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
Randomize
