do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
i just pissed myself at work. maybe they'll buy the old coffee spill trick
Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
Randomize
