I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Randomize
