i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
Randomize
