careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
Don't tell me you're on acid again
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
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