I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
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