I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
I guess I fist pumped too hard. I hit my mom in the face and now we're sitting in the ER.
When we told the nurse what happened, she replied with "OH, Well you don't look Italian to me!"
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
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