I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
