Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Randomize
