She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
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