but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
Randomize
