Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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