so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Randomize
