So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
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