in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Randomize
