matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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