if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Randomize
