dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
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