I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize