my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
My brain says no but my pants say off.
Why did I wake up this morning with 10 tally marks on my hand and a penis drawn on my tits?
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
i think i just lost a toe
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
