Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's like heaven, but drunker
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
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