I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
Seriously, I was a high class hooker. I was snorting shit Rachel, white powder, lines formed with credit cards, the dudes house was beautiful. Magnum condom. Adorable puppy dog. Pretty sure at some point I was sleeping on a washing machine. Boxing Gloves.
Those were the highlights of my night.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
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