I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
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