they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
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