do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
Randomize