Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
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Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
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Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
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