This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Randomize
