THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
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