i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize
