I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
