he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
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