It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize
