I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
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