he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
vagina is talking i cant
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Randomize
