and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you have to have Siri remind you that you're on your period cuz you're so drunk you keep forgetting about tampons it might be time to call it a night.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Randomize