ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
