he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
Randomize
