He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
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