I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
4 words: hood of his car
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
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