But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
