Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
Randomize