The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Randomize