you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
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