I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
Randomize
