Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
Randomize
