Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
