Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
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