yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!