Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Randomize
