Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
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